Baby, it's cold outside

After 6 weeks of being constantly accosted by incredible amounts of ice (sheets on every walking surface, outdoor rinks around every corner, chunks seemingly falling from the sky as ice is pushed off the roofs of large buildings to avoid it crashing through ceilings, broken and parted by the ferries on every sea route out of Helsinki, etc, etc), I finally got the chance to drag out my old hockey skates and take them for a spin. The Baltic Sea (or Bay of Finland here) has been frozen solid for weeks and provides a unique and pretty amazing opportunity for outdoor skating, especially if you have a love for endurance sports like I do. I have wanted to go skating on the sea since I first arrived but the bitter cold and the constant snow for weeks on end has made it nearly impossible. This winter has been one of the coldest and snowiest winters that Helsinki has had in decades (there was apparently no snow in the previous two years) and despite being well prepared for the cold, the city does not have enough snow removal equipment for the mass quantities which have fallen this year. I was told that the snow normally gets removed from the city streets and dumped into the ocean but that the dumping area is full and the sea ice is so thick and frozen solid that the snow cannot be pushed into the water. Subsequently, big yellow bulldozers have been on the streets over the past couple weeks just pushing snow to the sides of the road, without regard for those vehicles which may already be parked there. As you can see in some of the pictures, these vehicle owners might be taking the bus for a few months.

Because of the nearly daily snowfall and the difficulty of removing the snow from the city streets, skating on the sea has really been out of the question as this ice is a clear secondary priority to making all the major roads drivable again. There was finally a break in the snowfall for a few days which meant that the skating area in one of the local bays was likely clear too so I set out with my many layers (two pairs of wool ski socks, long underwear, two sets of pants, three shirts, two pairs of gloves, a hat, coat, snow pants, etc…I am getting smarter about this cold thing by the week!) and my previously retired hockey skates. A colleague had sent me the link to a (Finnish) website with the details of the largest sea skating “park” near Helsinki and with the help of Google translator I was able to figure out roughly where to go. I was a bit concerned by the fact that there was no address, and that the map on the website had a pin stuck in the middle of the bay instead of anywhere reachable by car or foot, but I figured that everyone must know where to go and that I could wing it with what was a sure to be a fluent English-speaking cab driver as they almost all are.

Unfortunately, I was wrong on both counts. Nearly everyone in Helsinki speaks excellent English but a small minority speaks close to none. As luck would have it, my cab driver was one of the “none” clan. I knew the name of the of neighborhood and had my skates with me which I used as props in an English-subtitled version of charades with the message, “I want to go skating on the sea in Munkkiniemi.” but this guy had no clue where to go. I pulled out my phone and tried to show the driver that I wanted to go to the coastal road in Munkkiniemi and he just rolled his eyes at me as if to say, “I know Munkkiniemi, lady, but I still have no clue where exactly you want me to take you.” I stayed in the taxi, pointed in the right general direction, and just said “Munkkiniemi” again and so we took off. I had looked up the location before I left and it was only about 6 km from my apartment but not walkable because of the all the snow and ice. Well, 6 km took two conversations with other cab drivers on the road, three phone-a-friends by my driver, and lots of backtracking and re-tracking but 35 minutes and the equivalent of $30 later, I finally arrived. (I got to roll my eyes back at the cab driver when after 20 minutes he pulled up to one of the hundreds of outdoor ice rinks that the local kids use for hockey games. My eye roll said, “I know this is ice, buddy, but do you really think I’d pay you $20 to drive me to a kids hockey rink when there is literally one on every block in this city?!”)

I am still not quite sure how the driver and, apparently, at least four others in Helsinki did not know where to go – there is a 6.5 km cleared path of ice on the bay, plus side paths and larger open areas, on which to skate. I arrived to see probably 20 kids, parents, and couples all gearing up on long benches ready to take advantage of the natural ice arena, plus many more already out on the bay. I put on my skates (with difficulty – I had forgotten what a pain it is to put on and lace up hockey skates!), left my boots on the bench (Helsinki is amazingly safe – you can leave nearly anything out in public without worrying about it being taken), and started tromping through the snow on my way to the ice. It turns out this was the hardest part of the whole escapade. Walking through snow hiding bumpy landscape and ice on a slight decline on skate blades is quite difficult, especially since I had not been in skates for at least a few years, and I was embarrassed as I made a fool of myself slipping and lurching forward. True to form, however, the Finns around me did not stare or laugh. These people mind their own business to a fault which can make it hard to make friends but much easier to get away with looking like a fool!

It only took a few minutes before I got my ice legs back and I had a great time skating, probably getting in nearly 10 miles all in. There were all kinds of skaters out – I saw hockey players, figure skaters, speed skaters, skaters with what looked to be a cross between figure skates and hockey skates (figure skate blades but no toe-pick and hard uppers like hockey skates) and using cross-country ski poles. I even saw babies in strollers being skated around the bay by their dads in hockey skates (the strollers had wheels, not blades, FYI). The ice was pretty amazing too. It is obviously very thick and was, surprisingly, quite smooth and even which is not what I was expecting from ice which has never seen a Zamboni. The only real hazard were the many large cracks in the ice which can catch your skate if you hit them the wrong way but they were fairly easy to avoid and made the skating more obstacle course-ish which was actually fun. I only fell once when my skate blade dropped into a crack and held me there but if you don’t fall at least once then you’re not pushing it, right? I got a pretty crazy bruise to show for it and considered it a small price to pay for a fun afternoon skating on the sea. You cannot skate on the sea just anywhere….thank goodness, perhaps! The more annoying price to pay for the afternoon was the $50 roundtrip taxi fare which is a bit steep for ice time. I will be looking for cheaper transportation alternatives!

I also had to opportunity to go out last week with a new friend, Pepe, who I was introduced to by mutual friend in the US. Pepe had emailed me earlier in the week saying, “I’m having beers with the guys this Friday. Wanna be one of the guys?” to which I, of course, replied, “Of course!” I arrived at the bar and was introduced to Pepe’s four friends…Jukka, Jaakke, Jaakko, and Juko (pronounced Yu-kah, Yah-kay, Yah-koh, and Yu-koh, respectively – yikes!). No, this is neither an exaggeration nor is it a joke (or "yoh-kay" as now suddenly seems appropriate). Wow. I figured that, lucky for me, the music was probably loud enough to allow me to get away with any one of those names for any one of those guys.

After a few hours with Pepe and the J’s, a few of us went to another bar where I met another Jukka (again, not a yoh-kay) who said, “Hei!” to which I replied, “Hi!” He said, “Where are you from?” I said, “US.” He said, “Oooohhhhh! You are American! You are very good looking!” Good, if a bit awkward, start. (I take every compliment I can get!) He followed with, “My dad has his own business. He has 15 million Euro.” Ouch. And all this time I thought that line was a San Francisco original! I said something like, “It sounds like he’s been very successful - good for him!” before escaping. Finns can be perceived to be a bit socially awkward by American standards just because they are generally much quieter and less extroverted. A little awkward is one thing but a little awkward and a lot clueless is quite another. No, thanks!

I traded in Jukka, Jaakke, and Juko last week for Oliver, Gunnar, and Klaus when I was able to spend several days in Germany experiencing Cologne Carnival and attending a conference in Frankfurt. Carnival was amazing and a truly German cultural experience (for which I was dressed as a carrot, but more on that later…). The Finns do not like to be mixed up with the Germans (actually, most Europeans do not appreciate getting confused for someone from another European country – everyone has a lot of national pride!) so, out of respect, I will save my stories from Germany for another blog another day. Until then, EN KÖLLE JEBÜTZ!